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Domestic violence


Lucy
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I hear on the radio that primary schools are going to start teaching that violence against women and girls is wrong. Would have thought this lesson should have been given by parents before children even get to school.

But I trust the lessons will also stress that violence against men and boys is also wrong or I suspect we will have vast numbers of women and girls using this initiative to their own advantage.

It's rather ironic that this news comes at the same time as the story about men complaining about being "bullied" by their female bosses and several murder cases where women have bumped off their menfolk.

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Think the situation is much more complex than is being portrayed; folk can establish dominance over others by physical superiority, mental superiority or by virtue of their position of power in a given enviroment. Traditionally, men have established dominance by virtue of their superior physical strength (hence this latest topic); but that neglects reference to how some men can be reduced to mice by a bunny boiler. There is now the new phenomenon of "ladettes" beating up "wimps" while on a night out - so not a black and white issue. I would suggest that an inability to compromise could arise from the "spoilt brat" syndrome, where folk have been brought up to expect everything they want? :? It's also interesting that the number of female peadophiles is on the increase: that a 4 year old was recently expelled from school for "assaulting" his teacher - in our PC world - the mind boggles! :wink:

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totally beyond me how a bloke can get bullied by a woman..... unless he is of a sensitive nature of course!

 

If a bloke retaliates towards a woman's bullying, then he's always judged to be in the wrong.

 

If he stands and takes it, he's seen as a wimp.

 

There may be reasons why he can't just walk away from the situation - kids, if it's domestic, needing the job if it's at work.

 

He's in a no-win situation, and some women - knowing that decent blokes are brought up to never, ever, under any circumstances, raise their hand to a woman - exploit this to make themselves feel powerful.

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Problem is that teaching children that violence is bad is all well and good...they then go home and watch it on TV and video games. :?

 

And that is one of todays main problems.

They do not get smacked and therefore do not know what pain is, and think that what they watch is for real.

 

Come back Mary Whitehouse.

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Surely a measure of "bullying" or "violence" is the natural order of life with any pack animal? The Alpha-male (DAD) takes precedence in the pecking order, followed by the Alpha-female (MOM), followed by their cubs - everyone understands it and conforms accordingly - alas, that's in what used to be called a "nuclear" family. The whole thing being held together by what's described nowadays as "hard love"; with clear divisions of labour and responsibility, and clearly established boundaries of behaviour - where NO means NO. Unfortunately, such a "family" arrangement appears to be scarce today; with no alpha-male role model in situ, just a series of visiting "uncles", a stressed out alpha female, trying to cloth and feed a load of sqawking kids, with high expectations of what they want (not necessarily need); inspired by a world of material advertising, the delivery of which compensates for love. Such high material expectations then transfer to the new generation, who in the harsh realities of the real world, discover that all their "wants" can't be sated, which leads to conflict with their "partners". The lack of authoritive "violence (a smack), imo leads to the development of spoilt brats, who grow up with a socio-pathic understanding of their rights and wants, without an understanding of their responsibilities or the boundaries set by the realities of life and the need for restraint in the wider interest of social cohesion or in modern parlance - social skills! :?

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I'm not suggesting they were or are H; floating fatherhood and illigitimacy isn't a new phenomenon, although perhaps now more socially acceptable in our neo-liberal wonderland. What I am suggesting is, that a strong family enviroment with traditional role models can mould individuals capable of self respect and the respect of others. :wink:

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Lucy, Senator Paul Wellstone from Minnesota and his wife Sheila created a foundation to promote an end to domestic violence. Oddly they are promoting a video of a wedding procession dance where the music is provided by Chris Brown, a person known to have committed great physical harm on his girl friend.

 

Hey, did I see this on the Forum? I think I did. Anyway, it bears repeating:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8DCt3Lmi28

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