Jump to content

One Fine day


Wingnut
 Share

Recommended Posts

One Fine Day

 

What a glorious day it is today.

It’s just about perfect for doing absolutely nothing, except for thinking daft thoughts . I’ve made meself a brew, got the chair out in the garden, and sat there with a book to read. I would read a few pages, have a sip of tea, and once again remind meself that this is just about as much exertion that I am going to put on meself for the rest of the afternoon.

 

I wouldn’t be so daft as to say, I could sit here all day without moving a muscle. One lad I used to know said that one day during his dinner break. As quick as a flash the foreman said, right then, you sit there, and I don’t want to see you move, stretch yourself or do anything. I think the lad lasted a full five minuits before he admitted defeat, and got up to start work again. Sitting absolutely motionless for any length of time and doing absolutely nothing must be near on an an impossibility. Unless of course you come from one of these deprived areas where getting nicked for lighting fires is classed as an occupational hazzard.

 

Then I got to wondering where should I go fishing this weekend, and what bait should I use?

The experts say that us anglers should try to put ourselves in the fish’s position, to try and understand what makes them tick. Are they just like us and one day they might prefer a piece of bread flake? and the next they might want a nice juicy lobworm?

 

Okay then, I'll put meself in the fish's position.

Let’s say somebody is watching me from above the clouds, and they want to catch me. They could dangle a line all the way down to earth with a Mars bar tied onto the end of it. My thoughts now are, would I get up from me comfy chair and make a grab for the Mars bar? No, I don’t think I would., I can’t be tempted that easily. But………… if it was a chip butty fluttering about enticingly in front of me, then there is no doubt in me mind that I would very soon be getting hoisted skywards to have me photograph taken and be weighed, before being released again back into me own private little world.

 

Me self and Grubby Pants do have plans for this weekend.

Actual fishing will only be part of the plan, because once darkness falls, that is our playtime. Grubby said he might be able to get hold of a man sized white rabbit suit. And the plan is that once it is dark enough and the resident smackhead is off his rocker again, one of us is going to wear the rabbit suit, and creep up on the druggy. If all goes well, the idea is to jump out of the bushes in front of the druggies bivvy, and shout; I’m Late, I’m late, and run off up the hill. I can’t wait to see his reaction.

 

I could have written about, the brown frittillary that I have just seen in me garden, or my latest wild flower sighting, but I'd far sooner concentrate on the more important things in life, like dressing up in rabbit suits, and getting abducted by a chip butty.

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

if it was a chip butty fluttering about enticingly in front of me, then there is no doubt in me mind that I would very soon be getting hoisted skywards to have me photograph taken and be weighed, before being released again back into me own private little world.

 

Your easily had wingy, it would have to have PSV and brown sauce to get me interested.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The only two things that would entice me if I was a fish..or as a human too are

 

Steak (well done), cottage cheese with chives, mushrooms, fried onions and cooked tomatoes

 

OR

 

A Bacon, sausage, melted cheese and brown sauce on toast.

 

As for your man sized rabbit suit Wingy... I'm still laughing and would love to see the photos if you actually do it. You have a very secial way with words and always give me the giggles. :lol: Very refreshing !

 

Have you written that book yet :P:wink:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm still collecting tales for it Diz. I get more time for it in the Winter.

As for Willium Wordsworth, didn't somebody once say they saw him going past the gas works on a Number 6 bus? The reply was; don't talk daft, everybody knows the Number 6 bus doesn't go past the gas works.

 

A strange thing happened tonight down the Quarry. I had nipped on to see Java man as he was doing the night on there. He asked me to watch his rods while he went back to his car for something. While he was gone, I thought I'd climb a tree next to his bivvy so I could get a better view of the water.

 

So, I'm up the tree, and this other bloke comes down, pokes his head in the bivvy, looks about and shouts hello is anybody here a couple of times. I don't know why, but I thought I would ignore him for a while and see what happens. This bloke was looking about to see if he could see anybody, but obviously never thought of looking up in the tree.

 

The daft thing is that the longer I left it to answer him and say look up in the tree mate, the harder it became to let him know I was there, it was now a bit of an awkward situation, so I decided to keep quiet and say nothing.

 

This bloke then opened Java mans bait bucket, helped himself to a handfull of boilies, and then left. I thought you cheeky g-t.

 

When Java man returned, I told him what had happened. You might think we were annoyed, but no we weren't. This was going to be another excuse for the pixies and elves to come out to play once it gets properly dark. :D:D:D

 

Don't you just love it when somebody hands you a gift like this on a plate. :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...