Not so dumb blonde

[asperity]

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive double-pane energy efficient kind, and today, I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them. Hellloooo,............ just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him. There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.

[Latchford Locks]

A blonde and a redhead have a farm.

They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have £500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and finds one for £499. Having only one pound left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one pound per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the operator to send the word "comfortable." Sceptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies,

"She's a blonde so she reads slow:

"'Come for ta bull.'"