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Everything posted by Chris

  1. I sat here thinking, "What the?", then on a 3rd read it dawned on me , and I haven't read the Sports forum page for ages.
  2. A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show, "Look, It's not the same hat!" or, "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table!" or "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?" The magician was furious but couldn't do anything, it was, after all, the Captain's' parrot. Then one stormy night on the Pacific, the ship unfortunately sank, drowning almost all who were on board. The magician luckily found himself on a piece of wood floating in the middle of the sea, as fate would have it ... with the parrot. They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day... and then 2 days ... and then 3 days. Finally on the 4th day, the parrot could not hold back any longer and said... "OK, I give up. Where's the f**!!#@ ship?"
  3. Thanks Gary - and thanks for the help in reminding me of my login. It's an age thing! Bit of a worry really. Which World Cup? Well, I did mean Football, but I take your point, so I'll stick Rugby Union in there too. Cricket? well .................. suppose so, but DEFINATELY NOT Rugby League. OK?
  4. So, did we all enjoy the 5 tackle-kick (so called) 'World Cup' ? Sore losers here in the antipodes - "we wuz robbed by the Pommy ref" Sad eh! Anyway, great to see the New Zealanders win. In fairness, I hope they drop the "World Cup' tag in future, and have a round-robin between the nations that actually play the game at a reasonable level - you might then get a Tri-Nations tournament, or possibly one, and at a stretch, two more teams. Having said that, at least most of the competing teams this year had some knowledge of the oval ball game (be it League or Union), not like in previous tournaments when various teams from eastern Europe and elsewhere were co-opted (!) to make up numbers. It's a bit like the Americans and their "World Series" baseball, or Australia's "World Series" cricket (although they do, at least get international teams in that Tri-Nations event.) Now - bring on the real WORLD CUP. _________________
  5. Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season" Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven." The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle", he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates" Saint Peter said. The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates". The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's undies. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?" The man replied, "These are Carols."
  6. Bullseye Eagle! An issue that's been debated here in the past. For English football to escape from the rut it's been in for far too long now, the FA MUST introduce a strict quota of non-English (or perhaps, non-British?) players in the EPL. Maybe (?) the standard of the EPL would suffer in the short term, but given a season or two I have every confidence the competition would flourish and retain it's world ranking. There must be a huge understorey of player talent in the country that is unable to gain the necessary exposure & experience in the EPL because of the number of imported players. Whilst I'd miss seeing the overseas talent week in & week out, I'm convinced that in the long-term, English football would be the winner, and who knows?, maybe a realistic tilt at the World & European Cups.
  7. How very sweet it was. The head of the ARU, John O'Neill, had been encouraging the "Hate England" campaign in the week before the match. Well he's ended up with not just egg on his face, but a ruddy great sloppy omelette. "Swing low, sweet chariot........." A steadily improving side can beat France, but can we beat Argentina or South Africa? Time will tell, but we did knock the Wallabies out, so this expat is a very happy chappy
  8. I'll miss the pouting. The dummy spits. The excuses. Not!
  9. Jeeze G'man, no wonder you're behind in your studies. Short, concise & to the point pls. BTW & FYI, I gave up a qtr way through.
  10. Could be a very interesting season - and I hope it is. One swallow does not a summer make, so I'm not counting my chickens just yet re Liverpool........or the other northern reds. I'm sure MU will bounce back, but like I said, it could be a very interesting season. PS I see Styles has apologised for his gaffe: "Yesterday, in mistakenly awarding a penalty, I accept that I may have affected the result of the match and for that I apologise." (although the words 'may have' should have been deleted from the above statement)
  11. Wrong side of the ditch Eagle, it's the Kiwi's that have a preference for Bahhhbraaa!
  12. It's called fence sitting over here Peter.
  13. It'll be fought out by Liverpool, Man U, Chelsea, Arsenal and Spurs....but I'd like to see a couple of bolters liven up the mix. Who'll win? ....ask me next May!
  14. UEFA president Michel Platini was keen to distance himself from outrageous accusations from one of his senior colleagues that Liverpool fans were the worst behaved in Europe. Asked whether Liverpool fans were to blame for trouble at some of the gates ahead of the clash with AC Milan, Platini said: "No, we cannot say that. We cannot point the finger. And, no, they are not the worst behaved in Europe. "The issue is not that they are English or Spanish, one club or another. It is simply about fans who travel without tickets. This is an old story. It is just that more English fans follow their clubs than those from other countries. It is not as if one set of fans are good or one set bad." 'nuff said
  15. http://www.smh.com.au/news/sport/new-olympic-logo-causes-epileptic-fits/2007/06/06/1180809556597.html Ecky thump! Not only a dreadful logo - but potentially dangerous too! Couldn't the Olympic Committee have selected something better? :confused:
  16. Ranieri. A good manager and gentleman to boot. Hope he does well.
  17. OK - Forget about the argy bargy amongst fans of the 'top flight' teams - what 3 teams are destined for the drop to 1st Div at the end of next season? :confused:
  18. Goonerman, I always thought the 'big one' is Imhotep, not Alexander. http://www.touregypt.net/featurestories/imhotep.htm
  19. Taking my son to Brisbane this coming weekend to watch the rugby test between Australia & Wales. Hope it's televised over there (maybe on satellite?)......I'll give you all a wave if it is!
  20. Slowed the pace nicely! Ah well 2 - 1 isn't a disgrace & fans are still singing. Great stuff! YNWA
  21. Yes! up since 4.30am. Now half time ( ) - dominated 1st half, should've been at least 1 Liverpool goal - had a bad feeling about that free kick right on the half. Good attacking bench - reckon Harry'll be on soon......and what about Pennant? - great half. Fingers crossed!
  22. Chris

    F.A Cup Final

    But wasn't it the force of the sliding United player who forced the Goalkeeper behind the line, which...and I stand to be corrected, would have been a foul and any goal disallowed. Maybe. The match commentators mentioned that,but also mentioned that Giggs momentum carried him into the keeper which mitigated the 'offence'. They also referenced the Chelsea player behind Giggs who could have been adjudged to have fouled him, causing Giggs loss of footing etc. All theoretical now. One thought did occur - cheeky I know - but if Cech had been a wicket keeper and claimed a catch that wasn't, he'd be castigated as a cheat (as has happened in the past at senior level). What's the difference between a wicket keeper claiming a catch that wasn't, and a goal keeper claiming a save that wasn't? :confused:
  23. Chris

    F.A Cup Final

    DEFINATELY not a classic, but Man U were hard done by. That ball did cross the line as the reverse video clearly showed - but, in fairness, it'd be harsh to blame the officials re ground level sight-lines. Still, having said that, if I was a MU supporter, I'd be miffed.
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