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asperity

Fake news

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A young mother was pushing her baby along the street in Manchester when suddenly a huge rottweiler dog lunged towards the pram, gnashing its teeth. The young woman thought for a moment that the dog would kill them when suddenly a man rushed over, wrestled with the rottweiler and broke its neck with his bare hands.

Another man rushed to the scene and said, “I am a reporter and I saw everything that happened. Wait until I put the headline in my paper. It will read ‘Manchester United fan saves baby from savage rottweiler!”

“No you can’t write that!” replied the man.

“But why not?” said the reporter.

“Because I am not a Manchester United fan, that’s why!” replied the man.

“Oh, okay then,” said the reporter, “I will write Manchester City supporter saves mother and baby from savage rottweiler!”

“You can’t write that either,” said the man.

“Why not?” asked the reporter.

“Because I am a Liverpool fan!” replied the man.

“Oh I see,” said the reporter, “How about this then, ‘Scouse mauls family pet!”

  • Haha 2

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