Latchford Locks Posted November 13, 2014 Report Share Posted November 13, 2014 Pat and Mick landed themselves a job at a sawmill. Just before morning tea Pat yelled: "Mick! I lost me finger!" "Have you now?" says Mick. "And how did you do it?" "I just touched this big spinning thing here like thi...Damn! There goes another one!" Paddy was in New York He was patiently waiting, and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The cop stopped the flow of traffic and shouted, "Okay pedestrians". Then he'd allow the traffic to pass. He'd done this several times, and Paddy still stood on the sidewalk. After the cop had shouted "Pedestrians" for the tenth time, Paddy went over to him and said, "Is it not about time ye let the Catholics across?" An Irishman walking along the shore notices an old lamp lying among the rocks. He picks it up, rubs the dirt off of it and a genie comes out of the lamp. The genie tells the Irishman he will grant him three wishes. The Irishman says "Well first off, I'd like a bottle of Guinness that never goes dry"."Done" says the genie, and the Irishman is holding a bottle of Guinness. The Irishman promptly drinks it down and watches in delight as it magically fills back up. Again he drinks it down and watches it fill up. A third time he drinks it down, and by now the genie is becoming impatient. "So what do you want for your other two wishes"? asks the irritated genie. "Oh", replies the Irishman, "Just give me another two bottles like this one". and last but not least...... Two Irishmen were out shooting ducks. One took aim and hit a bird which tumbled out of the sky to land at his feet. "Ah, you should have saved the bullet," said the other. The fall would have killed him anyway" thats all for now folks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wolfie Posted November 18, 2014 Report Share Posted November 18, 2014 Never mind Latch it will soon be Thursday again. Jokes about ducks are not all they're quacked up to be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Latchford Locks Posted November 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted November 19, 2014 Never mind Latch it will soon be Thursday again. Jokes about ducks are not all they're quacked up to be. Q: What time does a duck wake up? A: At the quack of dawn! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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