Jump to content

Leaderboard


Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation since 06/22/2011 in Posts

  1. 5 points
    Mix these tablets with the cattle feed - problem solved!
  2. 5 points
    Algy - you missed a really important date 1st of September 1999 - launch of the first independent daily online newspaper in the country - www.warrington-worldwide.co.uk 😎
  3. 5 points
    “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.” ― Mark Twain
  4. 4 points
    A reminder of why we have a Brexit problem. And it isn't the people!
  5. 4 points
    I knew I was supposed to be doing something a few weeks ago..oops. Gary...can you like or vote on others peoples post comments now? I'm not sure if other people can like or vote you and me up or down again though...probably a good thing that though especially for me ha ha
  6. 4 points
    Right, I've got the message too now having just given TEN - reds on this topic. So that's clearly the limit anyway. I'll report back sometime within the next 24 hours to say if/when my quota resets itself. That doesn't really explain yours though Wolfie but I'll see what I can find out although probably best that you can't give any anyway eh?
  7. 3 points
    A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, he leaned out the window and asked the cowboy: “If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?” Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, “Sure, why not?” The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany … Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, “You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.” “That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,” says Bud. He watches the man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then Bud says to the man, “Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?” The man thinks about it for a second and then says, “Okay, why not?” “You’re a Congressman for the U.S. Government”, says Bud. “Wow! That’s correct,” says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?” “No guessing required.” answered the cowboy. “You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don’t know a thing about how working people make a living – or about cows, for that matter. Because this is a herd of sheep! Now give me back my dog.”
  8. 3 points
    Credit for the images to all those people who posted them to Warrington Memories (FB) & Warrington Photos Warrington Born (FB).
  9. 3 points
    Partly parenting today and partly the "ooh we must protect the children from evil" brigade. As a kid growing up i was taught that doing wrong hurt, mainly because i got found out by my parents and the resultant "clip round the ear" hurt, result was that i did not do wrong again or at least not that my parents would find out about. (they usually did though). Today that would be classed as child abuse, along with it's many and varied cries of outrage that you could treat a child that way. As a kid growing up we had little in the way of valuable items, my first bike was not so much a hand me down as a Frankenstein, cobbled together from bits salvaged from old bikes scavenged from the tip or canal. an old butchers bike frame made from what appeared to be drainpipes coupled with the latest sturmey archer three speed gearing and lever brakes that only worked well if you stuck your feet on the floor as well. Muggings happened to old grannies on pension day and in other far off exotic places like manchester and liverpool. Kids these days cannot exist without a phone that cost more than a months wages and the latest designer trend fingernails. The answer lies in the trend towards not hurting the kids, naughty steps and time outs instead if a "clip round the ear". also in the fact that kids have no real boundaries as such and know that they will be believed if they say they have been abused/mistreated, even if it is a complete fabrication because dad/mum won't let them have an extra five minutes on candy crush. This trend has been ongoing since the late sixties and slowly gathering momentum and has resulted in a group of parents that were not "severely disciplined" and as a result are less inclined to be harsh on their kids, which in turn makes those kids less inclined as well until discipline, as such, is just given lip service by the parents and literally laughed at by their offspring. oh bugger rambling now so shut up SID. 🤭🤫
  10. 3 points
    Perhaps clothing manufacturers could step in and make all clothing stab resistant. If stabbing somebody has little effect then stabbing knife crime would go down.
  11. 3 points
    And finally....... An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a barstool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender: “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?” The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says: “Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things…The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat, the bouncer is a blonde girl, I'm a six-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter and the lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler. Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy. Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?” The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters: “Well, no! Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five bloody times!"
  12. 3 points
    97 eh, only time it gets that warm here is when Mrs sid has the heating turned up to turbo. I could sit out back on my home-made bench seat with a black grouse in one hand and the brolley in the other,( don't want to water down the drink) and listen to the night-life in the area. the low drone of the planes coming into liverpool, the occasional whine of the ambulance sirens and the dull throb of the police helicopter overhead. darn magpie still chattering away on the roof, neighbours barbie going well, now into the screaming drunks stage, that will need more than a few paracetamol in the morning and must make a mental note to get more slug pellets, considering how slow those buggers are they are really hard to hit with those pellets. oh well pot that for a game of soldiers off inside to thaw out and watch the test card channel.
  13. 3 points
    He should have just told her she had two days to live with her symptoms. Given that doctors often make a diagnosis on what the patient tells them initially. Wonder how she manages at the dentist? Last time i saw a doctor he was surprised I was a patient of his. He had to send somebody down to the basement to find my notes.
  14. 3 points
  15. 3 points
    If they vote against a no deal can we get them to have another vote for a no deal until they get it right.🤔🕵️‍♂️
  16. 3 points
  17. 3 points
    Is insulin available in Australia or Canada or Argentina or USA or anywhere else in the world not shackled to the EU ? Of course it is. Come to that in the days of World War 2 Britain produced it's own insulin This is up to us to produce it or buy it from any and all suppliers. These eurocrats cannot and will not hold our nations health to ransom !! They are simply trying to terrorise any other member state from leaving in future.
  18. 3 points
    PJ, your ignorance is showing - too much BBC maybe? You really would make a fine Democrat, no real ideas or productive policies, all you have are, childish personal attacks. Do you realize that in all of the discussions on this forum, you have never once advanced one grain of factual argument, it's all venom driven drivel. Counselling? Off on a short vacation folks, leave in an hour and it's colder'n a gold diggers ass in Montana - 45 degrees but they have heat in the casino, so I'll leave PJ to y'all.
  19. 3 points
    What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is a large, heavy animal and the other is a little lighter!
  20. 3 points
  21. 3 points
    No I haven't ever witnesses anyone dressed in 'the manner' committing a crime etc and I never said I had done....I have never said their dress code should be banned either I merely pointed out that it freaks me out a little and I explained why too. Yes I agree that someone with a hoodie pulled down over their face blah blah blah would probably make me feel a tad uneasy too as they often do....but why shouldn't I say if something makes me feel uneasy if it does....it's who I am and how things make me feel. Anyway you are clearly on a mission to make us all feel bad for our views or feelings and are throwing in the 'racist' card but I'm NOT being racist...I'd feel the same if you walked the streets with your face and body fully covered so I had no idea who you were, if you were male or female, what you were carrying......I mean come on even you must wonder sometimes.
  22. 3 points
    I think you two should get a room - preferably padded and soundproofed .
  23. 3 points
    What? Eat the rat? There's probably some EU directive against that
  24. 3 points
  25. 3 points
    Just about sums things up David Davis is at the golf club returning his locker key when Michel Barnier the membership secretary sees him. "Hello Mr Davis", says Mr Barnier. "I'm sorry to hear you are no longer renewing your club membership, if you would like to come to my office we can settle your account". "I have already settled my bar bill" says Mr Davis.. "Ah yes Mr Davis", says Mr Barnier, "but there are other matters that need settlement" In Mr Barnier’s office Mr Davis explains that he has settled his bar bill so wonders what else he can possibly owe the Golf Club? "Well Mr Davis" begins Mr Barnier, "you did agree to buy one of our Club Jackets". "Yes" agrees Mr Davis "I did agree to buy a jacket but I haven't received it yet". "As soon as you supply the jacket I will send you a cheque for the full amount". "That will not be possible" explains Mr Barnier. "As you are no longer a club member you will not be entitled to buy one of our jackets"! "But you still want me to pay for it" exclaims Mr Davis. "Yes" says Mr Barnier, "That will be £500 for the jacket. "There is also your bar bill". "But I've already settled my bar bill" says Mr Davis. "Yes" says Mr Barnier, "but as you can appreciate, we need to place our orders from the Brewery in advance to ensure our bar is properly stocked".. "You regularly used to spend at least £50 a week in the bar so we have placed orders with the brewery accordingly for the coming year". "You therefore owe us £2600 for the year".. "Will you still allow me to have these drinks?" asks Mr Davis. "No of course not Mr Davis". "You are no longer a club member!" says Mr Barnier. "Next is your restaurant bill" continues Mr Barnier. "In the same manner we have to make arrangements in advance with our catering suppliers". "Your average restaurant bill was in the order of £300 a month, so we'll require payment of £3600 for the next year". "I don't suppose you'll be letting me have these meals either" asks Mr Davis. "No, of course not" says an irritated Mr Barnier, "you are no longer a club member!" "Then of course" Mr Barnier continues, "there are repairs to the clubhouse roof". "Clubhouse roof" exclaims Mr Davis, "What's that got to do with me?" "Well it still needs to be repaired and the builders are coming in next week", your share of the bill is £2000". "I see" says Mr Davis, "anything else?". "Now you mention it" says Mr Barnier, "there is Fred the Barman's pension". "We would like you to pay £5 a week towards Fred's pension when he retires next month". "He's not well you know so I doubt we'll need to ask you for payment for longer than about five years, so £1300 should do it". "This brings your total bill to £10,000" says Mr Barnier. "Let me get this straight" says Mr Davis, "you want me to pay £500 for a jacket you won't let me have, £2600 for beverages you won't let me drink and £3600 for food you won't let me eat, all under a roof I won't be allowed under and not being served by a bloke who's going to retire next month!" "Yes, it's all perfectly clear and quite reasonable" says Mr Barnier. Now we understand what Brexit is all about.
  26. 3 points
    I agree Dizzy, Perth looks lovely, and makes me want to go there too! But, do any of you honestly believe that this competition really has anything at all to do with culture? In these days of 'fake austerity' it seems to me like nothing more than an excuse for pouring public money into developer's pockets. Check out how much previous contestants have spent on building 'cultural' venues in order to be a 'contestant', then check how many of these venues have become money draining white elephants only to lie empty or be converted to cheap offices etc. WBC has for years allowed its built heritage to be destroyed, have employed a 'regeneration officer' infamously renown for destroying precious roman heritage in Chester and wouldn't know what 'culture' was if it smacked them in the face. They have embarked upon a town centre regeneration programme that CABE actively criticized and refused to support, whilst the beautiful Victorian Bridge St which could have been the town's best tourist attraction has been left to rot. They have allowed a town centre nightlife of drugs, drink and violence to flourish, have allowed the ancient home of the first Lord of Warrington to be converted into yuppie apartments and but for mass public outrage would have sold off Walton Hall and Gardens to become a 'boutique hotel'. etc. etc. etc. Notably, they were recently voted worst in the country for culture. Yet despite all this I wouldn't be at all surprised if they were well placed in, or even won, this farce of a competition, because I think the real criteria is how much profit the contestants can generate for the developer friends of this greedy, materialistic government.
  27. 3 points
    Well, there was an interesting prog on TV about the Falklands War; and it seems it was a close run thing, a lot closer than we realised at the time. The only way to protect overseas interests, is to retain the ability to project air & sea power to the point of conflict, so making our servicemen redundant and not having a carrier, would seem rather irresponsible in respect of a rematch with the Argies. As for Maggie, as much as I may despise her; she was decisive (unlike most politicians), a trait required at the time of the War; and unlike Bliar Wars, a defence of British territory, not an invasion of others.
  28. 3 points
    See people still not changed on here still from the Hillsborough topic still have to have their childish little digs thought I would come back to give it a go but not for me Gary shame toting up as well 13 years been a pain in your side ...lol no wounder you have gone white well end of the day now mate
  29. 2 points
    Seems Labour are really going for it : everything is to be FREE ! A free weekly wage to every citizen, regardless of whether you work or have worked, thus providing an incentive not to work; the idea was tried and dumped in Finland some time ago; but will no doubt prove a vote winner amongst the work shy. Free education, should increase the number of lifelong students, picking up those micky mouse degrees, whilst being PC programmed. No doubt such policies will be a major attraction to the world's poor, who will be heading through Labour's open doors on to UK streets paved with gold. You really couldn't make it up - but they are !
  30. 2 points
    It must be heartbreaking for the people who work at these showrooms. They rely on the sales of these vehicles to get paid. And how will it be if the likes of Skoda, Fiat and the other firms decide enough is enough and pull out of Warrington altogether, leaving Winwick Road a wasteland? Disgusting doesn't come close to describing the actions of these mindless vandals.
  31. 2 points
    So if we can use satellites to track the movement of turtle anywhere in the world why do we still loose bloody big aircraft ???? 🥺 Bill
  32. 2 points
    Trudeau has made the usual mistake - he has apologised instead of telling his critics to do one!
  33. 2 points
    Our constitution is not all written but it does exist and the enemy of it has without doubt been this Parliament. However it has to be said in my view that the House of Commons bears the clearest blame and in it Speaker Bercow has enabled the revolting actions by a litany of unconstitutional moves over a long period. A more biased Speaker it is hard to imagine and it is to be hoped that he will never be ennobled but I suspect if the rogues in Labour ever take power in the next ten years the little git with the Napoleon complex will be made a Lord.
  34. 2 points
    It was on the main Liverpool to Stockport line until the ship canal was built which cut the line in two. Hence the high level bridge was built at Latchford Locks. and the new high level line came into being Joining from the original line at Bank Quay.Which meant a new station where the Cantilever Garden Centre was.The old station fell into disrepair until my Dad got it in 1942 and set about turning it into a wonderful family home.
  35. 2 points
    LibDems: Brexit is the biggest existential threat this country has ever known and we must do all we can to defeat it. We need a government of national unity, right now. Jeremy Corbyn: I agree, and as leader of Her Majety’s Loyal Opposition (snigger) I will step forward to lead that GNU and ensure no deal Brexit doesn’t happen. LibDems: Its not that big a threat.
  36. 2 points
    We have the lowest unemployment (2%) and the highest GDP since the 1940's, the Isis Caliphate has been destroyed, talks are ongoing with North Korea, new businesses are opening at record rates, consumer confidence is also at a record high. The battle against illegal aliens is being fought with both hands behind our back, because Democrats refuse to cooperate by building a wall and changing the stupid laws that allow millions to pour in. The press is a total joke, an unabashed arm of the Democratic Party, the pictures they showed of children being held in cages at the border, were in fact taken during the Obama administration. The Meuller Report dispelled the collusion hoax and on obstruction of justice, the report found that Trump did have a meeting with his aides to discuss firing Meuller, but they decided not to do it. Now, grasping at straws, the Democrat idiots are clamoring for impeachment ! Apparently, in their twisted minds, thinking about something but not doing it, is now a high crime and misdemeanor ! I just heard that Trump will be in the U.K. in June, so I thought that I would give you an overview of the true situation before you see y'alls idiots out demonstrating. He is a good man, doing a fantastic job running the country and this is why he cannot be allowed to continue and lies, cheating and subterfuge are all in the press and Democratic playbook. You may not like his personality or his demeanor, but he's getting the job done and career politicians don't like that - remember Sir Jeffery ....... in Yes Minister ? In two and a half years I have not heard one Democrat make any policy statement, they have nothing, they know they can't compete on economy and security, so it's hate Trump twenty four hours a day.
  37. 2 points
    Errm nope; the report stated that the Doctor complained that the niquab muffled the sound of her voice - end of. I'm merely observing the absurdity of the situation, where a much needed professional is being threatened with being struck off because of some primitive religious practises, based in male dominance.
  38. 2 points
    I think that the illegal witch hunt against Trump and the efforts of the British MP's regarding Brexit, conclusively proves that all politicians should join the lawyers on the first rocket ship to Mars. Good riddance, they're giving the sane people of the world a daily case of heartburn.
  39. 2 points
    Bolton's game against Brentford on Saturday has been called off by the English Football League after Bolton's players said they would not play until they receive the wages they are owed. The match was called off 16 hours before it was scheduled to kick off. None of the March wages owed to the Wanderers' players have been paid. I often wonder how clubs out of the "Elite" few managed to pay the exorbitant(obscene) wages demanded these days by people who at the end of the day just kick a ball around and occasionally into a net ? Like all good things maybe this gravy train is going off the rails.
  40. 2 points
    Glad to help Asp. That's exactly why I posted it Obs, I wasn't bragging I just felt like someone should tell it like it is before the idiots turn out and start making intelligent comments like breaking windows and burning cars. I'm already expecting an inane response from you know who !
  41. 2 points
    Had a nasty experience whilst trying on clothes in a shop. I tell you when those lift doors opened I don't know who got the biggest shock, me or the three women waiting to get in.🙈👀😯
  42. 2 points
    Seems we've got into a state of political hysteria over "knife" crime, as if a weapon in and of itself is the cause. Surely it's the mind behind the weapon, be it a gun, a knife or a vehicle, that needs attention ?
  43. 2 points
    blockade the ports!!!!!! (works for the french) 🤭 so we now have a vote of no confidence in the current gov. There is talk of suspending article 50 and of the possibility of a new referendum or a general election. So why suspend article 50, we as a country voted out, article 50 gives up that get out. If they want to hold a new referendum then why not wait until we are out first. give it twelve months and then hold one. By all means have a general election, it will just mean that the same old faces will be there but with different job titles. Still drawing their wages and topping up their huge pension pots whilst telling us that we should be doing more to tighten our belts "after all we are only getting a 25% pay rise this year, we don't really want it but that is the amount that was decided on by the ministers and we can't change that honest" says one politician as he climbs into his top of the range motor and heads for his gentleman's club for a few brandies and a good meal.🤥
  44. 2 points
    If the alarm is usable then get some advice on who to use it as an alarm system is an important part of the protection of your property, Webb Alarms service ours and as part of their service they will talk you through how to operate it. Google for their web site the contact number is on there.
  45. 2 points
    There was a perfect man and a perfect woman. They met each other at a perfect party. They dated for two perfect years. They had the perfect wedding and the perfect honeymoon. They had two perfect children. One day the perfect man and the perfect woman were driving in there perfect car, they saw an elf by the side of the road, being the perfect people they were they picked him up. Well as the perfect man and the perfect woman were driving with the elf, somehow they got into an accident. Two died and one lived. Who died and who lived? . . . . . . . The perfect woman, because the perfect man and elves aren't real.
  46. 2 points
    I'll be 80 in January - Algy knows what I'm talking about. However, I feel as fit as I have ever done, I'm out on my road bike most days, play eighteen holes of golf everyday pretty much year round, jitterbug for four hours at a country dance every Saturday night and yet I can't get away from doctors offices ! One decides that I haven't had a piss test for a long time, so he sends me for one. Then he sees it and says "I'm suspicious about something, you'd better see a kidney specialist and I think you need to take these pills for your thyroid (made me feel like crap and I just dumped them in the toilet.). The naphrologist (!) sends me for a catscan and extra blood work. She asks me if I drink, I said "like a fish, I call Jim Beam, Jimmy." I've been drinking whiskey and coke for a hundred years, she tells me - no coke, only 7 up. She also makes me an appointment with a heart specialist ! me who can't raise my heart rate or heartbreat when I'm climbing 1 in 4 hill ! Well, I just mixed me a huge whiskey and COKE and that may explain this posting !. Let me get another.one real quick. I see the Naph.... kidney doctor next Monday and she'll be staring down both barrels cos I've had enough ! No more blood work, no more scans, no more biopsies etc etc. That's it. As I said, I'm almost 80 years old, a world record in my Victorian age family, again, Algy will understand that. I pretty sure I can make 85 on cruise control and I'll take that. So no more doctors, I'm going to spend my time on cruises, casinos and disreputable women (that's my wife ). Have I made the right decision?
  47. 2 points
    A young mother was pushing her baby along the street in Manchester when suddenly a huge rottweiler dog lunged towards the pram, gnashing its teeth. The young woman thought for a moment that the dog would kill them when suddenly a man rushed over, wrestled with the rottweiler and broke its neck with his bare hands. Another man rushed to the scene and said, “I am a reporter and I saw everything that happened. Wait until I put the headline in my paper. It will read ‘Manchester United fan saves baby from savage rottweiler!” “No you can’t write that!” replied the man. “But why not?” said the reporter. “Because I am not a Manchester United fan, that’s why!” replied the man. “Oh, okay then,” said the reporter, “I will write Manchester City supporter saves mother and baby from savage rottweiler!” “You can’t write that either,” said the man. “Why not?” asked the reporter. “Because I am a Liverpool fan!” replied the man. “Oh I see,” said the reporter, “How about this then, ‘Scouse mauls family pet!”
  48. 2 points
    If 95% of the population were in his shoes they would have done the same. He wants congratulating not arresting.
  49. 2 points
    Magistrates are to discuss raising the age of criminal responsibilty from 10 to 14 years old. That would mean that any child under 14 years would not have to face a magistrate or judge for any crime committed, including murder. Then if agreed they will approach Chris Grayling, the Justice Secretary, to ask him to get the age of responsibity raised. Kids know the difference between right and wrong by the time they are 10 years old. The number of times I threatened to report to the police kids of 7, 8, 9 and 10 for attempting to steal from my shop, for swearing and abusive language, for criminal damge etc., is unbelievable but the little thugs just laugh in your face and say, "Go on....Report me to the police, they can't do anything, I'm underage!" The magistrate appear to believe that not being taken to court for their crimes would prevent reoffending. Yeah right!
  50. 2 points
    Real as in what Kije? Real as in the council can still waste money on a Chief Executive that is not needed (as many other local authorities have found)? Real as in my council tax is ridiculous for the service we get from the council? Icy and snow bound roads every year? Real as in broken street lamps that take months to be repaired? Real as in thousands wasted on back-slapping dinners for new mayors? Or real as in the almost £700,000 our councillors claim in allowances every year - which no doubt is about the Actual council tax revenues from a couple of our council estates... All I appear to get for my council tax is a bin collection once a week and I am damned if I am going to let them take that away without a fight
×
×
  • Create New...