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Showing content with the highest reputation since 10/17/2019 in Posts

  1. 3 points
    I like the old jokes best......It makes it easier for me to know when to laugh......🤣
  2. 2 points
    when the media didn't have too much time/space to fill we were spared this dross. We need to get back to simpler times, perhaps put the potter's wheel and other interlude films on News24 most of the day.
  3. 2 points
    HOW TO GIVE YOUR CAT A PILL: 1) Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. 2) Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. 3) Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. 4) Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten. 5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. 6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously. 7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill inside end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw. 9) Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap. 10) Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band. 11) Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom. 12) Call fire brigade to retrieve the f------ cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap. 13) Tie the little b**tard's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of steak filet. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down. 14) Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and remove pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table. 15) Arrange for RSPCA to collect "mutant cat from hell" and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters. HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL: 1) Wrap it in cheese.
  4. 2 points
    It must be heartbreaking for the people who work at these showrooms. They rely on the sales of these vehicles to get paid. And how will it be if the likes of Skoda, Fiat and the other firms decide enough is enough and pull out of Warrington altogether, leaving Winwick Road a wasteland? Disgusting doesn't come close to describing the actions of these mindless vandals.
  5. 2 points
    "it doesn't matter it's not ours and the police won't do anything" probably. If they are ever caught then they should get the sheriffs in and goods should be taken from them to the value of the damage done plus sheriffs costs. Think mum and dad would think twice about where their little angels are if they suddenly found that their car, tv and sofa were off to the auction to pay for their little darlings fun.
  6. 2 points
    Hopefully to give them a commendation and a thank you for saving them a bit of time.🤨
  7. 2 points
    Surprised they weren't beaten up. Seems the Police who stood by and watched these cranks on top of the train, are now threatening to investigate thos members of the public who pulled then off - the world's gone mad
  8. 2 points
    Ours in nowhere near £855 a year (in Warrington). I suppose when they take an average price per place that includes all the premiums paid by younger drivers. Maybe Warrington just has more younger drivers that Exeter etc.
  9. 1 point
    Well we've finally reached an opportunity for "the people" to have their say on Brexit. A fairly clear choice of runners and riders - LibunDems = Revoke & Remain; LAB = Another Referendum & Remain; CON = Boris's bad deal; or Brexit Party = Clean Break (no deal) Brexit. So now it's for the electorate to decide and hope they're not as muddled as Parliament, however we've now got some saying they won't vote, some saying it'll be too cold to go out to vote (never heard of PV); so it's quite possible we could get another hung Parliament and a lack of decision, on what is a binary issue, one way or the other. In which case we would Remain the global laughing stock we've become.
  10. 1 point
    But at least the eco friendly cars will be able to function. Maybe instead of arresting these protesters they should round them up ship them to an island with no amenities and see how long they can stick it out. no phone no electric, no gas fires, no shops,no shelter. Just what they are wearing for clothing at the time. Wonder how long they would last, how many of the trees would be chopped down for shelter or for heating and cooking. Be an interesting experiment.
  11. 1 point
    The lowest turnout since the war was 59.4% in 2001 but this time it should be up at 70% again. It was 68.7% in 2017.
  12. 1 point
    Can see why Asp. I drink my coffee black, but with sweetener. Was sat at a table in Constitution Sq in Athens. Waiter appeared from a tunnel which crossed under a six lane city street from one of the hotels lining the Sq. Ordered coffee and he disappeared back into the tunnel. Twenty minutes later he was back. When I asked where's the milk? He looked at me, said Ahh and disappeared back down the tunnel! ! Didn't bother to wait, enjoyed it and I've drunk it black ever since.
  13. 1 point
    Looking at Which Warrington is in 88th place for car insurance out of 126 post codes, average price of insurance is £855.55 in Warrington. Cheapest is Galashields average price is £544.84 followed by Exeter. Manchester is 111 (£1128.60) and Liverpool 112 (£1140), Wigan is 93, Preston 91, Blackpool 68, Chester 67, while Oxford is 40 average insurance is 666.43, Swindon is 38, Newcastle Upon Tyne 65. Most expensive is London West average price of car insurance £1734.80! Looking at crime levels Warrington car crime is 2% hire then in Exeter. I surprised car crime is so high in Warrington also surprised car insurance is so expensive, I pay £168!
  14. 1 point
    See local Labour Members have been by-passed by London, with another PPC being parachuted into Warrington N.
  15. 1 point
    So if i don't vote then you can't blame me for the result. i have no problem with parachuting MP's in, provided it is into the nearest war hotspot.
  16. 1 point
    78 years I was born there, so that give you a clue. It was known as The Brough General Cheers, Jean The Thousand Islands Region Canada
  17. 1 point
    And when whoever it is gets elected... the only people to blame will be the voting public.
  18. 1 point
    Priceless. That guy explaining looked like a mad scientist from a horror film. Got me when they said "or to help distressed people in bombed out areas." No counselling in those days. "had your house blown up ave yer. ere have a cup of tea that will make things better" And that smile on mothers face near the end "yes then tea will revive you" Big those tea bags though and recycled unlike today's one shot lob it away things. Have to say my dad must not have watched that film as he did everything that you shouldn't when he made tea and would often stick the tin teapot on teh gas if the tea had gone cold and boil it up again. So much tannin stain in his pot that it looked like it could be used to tar a roof.
  19. 1 point
    It's been known about for decades, that increased paved areas provide faster run off, which our rivers etc can't cope with. The flood plain is the natural soak away to hold excess water and slow flow down. Alas, despite knowing this, Authorities have continued to build on and within flood plains to date. Yes, a good deal of preventative work has been done EG; the barriers in Warrington along Kingsway; but at the end of the day, nature will keep the pressure on, EG coastal erosion, where swathes of our coastline have now been written off. The other aspect to this. is the enormous amount of energy that flood waters can provide if captured and re-directed, thus providing green energy. Alas all this requires a long term, co-ordinated plan, political will and the money to invest in such fundementals, rather wasting cash on such things as HS2.
  20. 1 point
    I recall years ago a report warning that paving off gardens and building near rivers would lead to floods in future. If you plug a leak in a river surely it will flood somewhere else. If you build flood defenses you need to have somewhere for the water to go, so you need to create floodplains, water storage and/or increase the rate the water can flow at.
  21. 1 point
    Seems Labour are really going for it : everything is to be FREE ! A free weekly wage to every citizen, regardless of whether you work or have worked, thus providing an incentive not to work; the idea was tried and dumped in Finland some time ago; but will no doubt prove a vote winner amongst the work shy. Free education, should increase the number of lifelong students, picking up those micky mouse degrees, whilst being PC programmed. No doubt such policies will be a major attraction to the world's poor, who will be heading through Labour's open doors on to UK streets paved with gold. You really couldn't make it up - but they are !
  22. 1 point
    Who are these people? Why are they allowed to flourish? How come there's no movement against them by the intelligent people? Is there a law that only stupid people are allowed a voice? Just askin'.
  23. 1 point
    Thinking about the term extinction rebellion i have to wonder if they have really thought through their name. I mean are they rebelling for extinction or are they rebelling against it. Very misleading i feel. do they not realise that life is like a scifi disaster B movie. everybody dies in the end.
  24. 1 point
    Are you allowed to use the term MANSplaining these days, is that not un-PC? Same could be said of WHITESplaining as well.Very un-PC. Surprised the PC brigade have not started on the towns and cities, Blackpool, Whitehaven, Manchester not to mention Cockington.(a very picturesque village in Torquay). I mean who comes up with these terms. Do they think of a daft word and then say i know what we can use that for. Or do they just randomly pull out a letter from a scabble set until they have some thing that sounds ridiculous and then think of a daft definition. Getting that way that you will soon need something like google translate just to understand the terminology used in the average news report about a local flower show.🥴
  25. 1 point
    *Dusts off tin hat, applies fresh coat of polish and hands it over.*....⛑️
  26. 1 point
    A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the next question correctly, she would win £1,000,000. If she answered incorrectly, she would pocket only the 32,000 milestone money. And as she suspected it would be, the million-pound question was no pushover. It was, "Which of the following species of birds does not build its own nest, but instead lays its eggs in the nests of other birds?Is it A) the condor; B) the buzzard; C) the cuckoo; or D) the vulture?" The woman was on the spot. She did not know the answer. And she was doubly on the spot because she had used up her 50/50 Lifeline and her ask the audience Lifeline. All that remained was her Phone-a-Friend! Lifeline. The woman hoped she would not have to use it because ... her friend was, well .. blond. She had no alternative. She called her friend and gave her the question and the four choices. The blonde responded unhesitatingly: "That's easy. The answer is C: The cuckoo." The contestant had to make a decision and make it fast. She considered employing a reverse strategy and giving any answer except the one that her friend had given her. And considering that her friend was a blonde, that would seem to be the logical thing to do. On the other hand - the blonde had responded with such confidence, such certitude, that the contestant could not help but be persuaded. "I need an answer. " Crossing her fingers, the contestant said, "C: The cuckoo." "Is that your final answer?" "Yes, that is my final answer."She replied. Two minutes later, the host said, "That answer is ... absolutely correct! You are now a millionaire!" Three days later, the contestant hosted a party for her family and friends including the blonde who had helped her win the million dollars. "Jenny, I just do not know how to thank you! ," said the contestant. "How did you happen to know the right answer?" "Oh, come on," said the blonde. "Everybody knows that cuckoos don't build nests. They live in clocks."
  27. 1 point
    Funny, though we have the occasional murder, we don't have a vandalism problem. Mindlessly setting fire to things and destroying property seems to be a major U.K. problem. Bad parenting is always a factor, but the overriding factor is that there are no consequences. I witnessed the beginnings of soccer hooliganism at Old Trafford, where visiting supporters decided to break the windows of houses lining the approach street. The cops, dozens of them, just stood and watched. When asked why, they said "As long as they are not killing anyone, we have been told to leave them alone." Once the idiots realized that, the flood gates opened. I'm an hardass and proud of it, I don't think the law should be watered down for teenagers. They seem to do the most vandalism and should be punished regardless of age. The tree huggers theories of compassion are always wrong and usually do more harm than good. A fire is a fire no matter the age of the arsonist. They may eventually learn to be good, but a good dose of what life can be like if they don't, wouldn't go amiss.
  28. 1 point
    Good, the thing that concerned me was just that you said that it was for Boris to do a deal with Nigel. Rather it is for Nigel to act sensibly, which he can do without any deal with Boris but still have a big effect. Boris simply cannot do a deal as the article says.
  29. 1 point
    It is true that the assumptions behind the stay put plan were incorrect because of the modifications but that is the tip of the iceberg in terms of causation. The resignation of the Chief Fire Officer would be a monstrous failure to understand the actual causes. There are, I am sure, many things that need fixing and only when they are understood can anyone say that the CFO should have acted differently. Without that understanding it is just scapegoating to protect the guilty and a repeat could happen again. I think there are some sacred cows at the heart of this appalling affair and they need finding out.
  30. 1 point
    if the candidate i vote for does not get in can i challenge the result in the scottish courts?....🤔...🤭
  31. 1 point
    Harry, having preached about the environment I hear is going to Japan to watch Rugby, can he not watch it on TV?
  32. 1 point
    The old ones are the best Latch 🤣🤣
  33. 1 point
    There are plenty of anomalies in this incident. The driver has so called gone unit only to collect a trailer from Purfleet docks that has come from Belgium on a ferry. No doubt the trailer has been sealed from its last pick up point & will need a ticket & manifest to get on the boat. Why has the driver stopped on the industrial estate ...were his instructions to let x number of illegal immigrants out or has he been met by some other party there who has opened the trailer ? I would think the driver's conscious involvement in the incident is very low ,a dupe perhaps who was needed to get the trailer off the docks. I would think if this lad was involved that his first action on finding a trailer full of bodies would be to drop the trailer & get the hell out of there. Instead, the unit is still coupled to the trailer & it is probably the driver who has phoned the police. It would not surprise me if his arrest is police protection & he will turn Queen's evidence.
  34. 1 point
    I don't know Obs, I've never managed to get an appointment with a doctor to ask them 🙄.
  35. 1 point
    Falling about laughing here! I mean the idea that you can actually get an appointment to see a GP, absurd notion 🤣🤣😂
  36. 1 point
    I liked Harry but he seems to be badly influenced just recently. I can understand him blaming the press for his mothers' death (although if she had worn a safety belt and not refused security she probably would still be alive) Di courted the press when it suited her then seemed to object when they took an interest, just like Harry and his wife are doing now. I fail to understand why after all these years he is choosing to sue the News of the World and the Sun or how is able to, surely the time limit to sue has expired?
  37. 1 point
    Drivers hours are a pain, totally inflexible. Yet only the UK government strictly enforces them. The UK government limit night out pay tp a very low rate
  38. 1 point
    Ah but they have access to british databases for such purposes. Us brits may not have access to their databases in return though. (probably against EU human rights law or something) 🕵️‍♀️
  39. 1 point
    These traitors are worthy of our revulsion.
  40. 1 point
  41. 1 point
    They've been doing it for years years Sid - the IRA Party.
  42. 1 point
    I am much enjoying the complaints about the letter not being signed. The law required him to send a letter in the form given in the Annex to the Benn Act. That Annex gave a format which did not contain the usual formulation [signed] where the signature should go. Consequently Boris obeyed the law to the letter by not signing it. It is hardly the government's fault that the drafting of the Act by the rebels was incompetent. If they had not been so childish and simply told Boris what the effect of the letter should be he would have had to sign it, but that he did not do so is their own doing. The EU were watching everything on Television anyway in Brussels so the content of the letter is not really for Brussels but to annoy Labour and the SNP, which seems to have worked.
  43. 1 point
    Within the terms of the Benn Act Boris could have written a letter dated tomorrow to be opened at 0900 CET and the European Council could have given him a reply dated tomorrow, not to be opened before 0930 BST. The contents of the EU council letter being "Non", Barnier did say he was a bit of a Gaullist. Boris then reads the letter to the Commons and suddenly before any amendments are considered it is back to one vote deal or no deal. That is how to get out of this disaster movie we are stuck in. The remoaners then have nowhere to go since anything other than approving the deal is approving no-deal, their heads would explode. I know it is wishful thinking but one can dream.
  44. 1 point
    Not yet, the current deal only sets the arrangements for the withdrawal from the Union, the subsequent Free-trade agreement is then negotiated within the framework of the Political Agreement after the competence to negotiate trade deals is returned to the UK at Brexit. This separation of the stages is the way it is laid out in the dreaded Article 50. The Political Agreement allows negotiations up to the end of 2020 to achieve a Canada deal style solution. I don't think a Norway style deal is on the table because that involves being a member of EFTA, and whilst we were once in EFTA our economy is larger than all the current members taken together. Also a Norway style deal means taking all EU regulation directly into force for all time, and that is incompatible with the objectives currently being used
  45. 1 point
    Deal or no deal was much easier to understand when Noel Edmonds was the host. (funnier too).🤭
  46. 1 point
    Apparently, they are taking legal action because their civil liberties to protest are being disrupted by the police. They don't seem bothered about infringing the rights of the public to go about their lives unhindered.
  47. 1 point
    Seems a bunch of our celebs have written an open letter in support of XR, and admitting that they're hypocrites for their high carbon celeb lifestyles. Geldorf, Commerbach and even Ray Winston; all asking to be excused their carbon footprints for the greater good. Seems the rich want the rest of us to give up our cars, central-heating, and holiday flights; while they carry on doing what they've always done. As for XR, one was filmed trying to smash a glass door, while the Police appeared to be looking on - time they were arrested and locked up for a long time; they are no more than a modern religious cult, with a puritanical disregard for any view but their own.
  48. 1 point
    Clucas, this is the original Dog & Dart Inn which stood on the junction of Knutsford Road, Stockport Road and Chester Road, Grappenhall. Credit to Andrea Daniels for the black & white photo. The original Dog and Dart Inn, Grappenhall. c1925. The small single story building is the Toll keepers cottage.
  49. 1 point
    I get the feeling a lot of the whinging will have been based on past experiences and frankly inadequate management. They certainly seem to be more forward looking and positive recently. More power to them.
  50. 1 point
    Well therein lies the problem Gary. The referendum was a binary vote which resulted in a decision to LEAVE, with no conditions attached. The great and the good never entertained the idea that the plebs wouldn't vote for remain and didn't legislate for it all going wrong for them. The result is the mess we find ourselves in. This is now being painted as the fault of those who voted to leave rather than being the fault of the remain side who have spent the last 3+ years trying to overturn the outcome of a legitimate vote.
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